Walking through Chicago, you see parents interacting with their kids all the time. Walking down sidewalks, playing at parks, on the train, pushing strollers and wearing baby-wraps. Kids being rewarded, and being disciplined. Parenting styles of all kinds are on full display – some styles absolutely baffle me, others make me cringe…but there are times when you see a partent engage a child in such a way that it inspires not only the kid, but all watching, to live a better life.
Many parents love their children, but few parents know how to put that love into constructive action. What I mean is, sometimes we think we’re loving a child when we’re actually harming her. Love is not as simple as a kiss on the cheek or handing them 50 candy-bars a day just to appease their wishes.
Not being a parent myself, I can not assume I would be any different than countless well-meaning parents in Chicago – and my heart goes out to folks doing the most important work in the world, raising up the next generation. It IS the most important work…which is why this question must be asked…
What does Love do?
I look to the perfect picture of familial love – the Father God and his Son Jesus Christ. Review the Gospels to find what the most beautiful, ultimate parenting skills look like in action. Re-read the Gospels with the eyes of how God ‘parented’ Jesus, and you may find that the Love of the Father sends his Son into Mission.
I’ve seen some parents walking down the street with their two-year-old running about 20 feet behind them, frantically trying to keep up; I’ve seen other parents let their kids shoot ahead of them unawares, running at full-speed toward busy streets, and still others keep their kids on leashes, never leaving them out of their reach (with literal leashes~ or a GPS on their teen’s cell phone)!
Watch the Father keep his Son intimately close for years, teaching him who He is and Whose He is. At twelve years old, Jesus has a better grip on his identity and his mission than most adult Christian leaders. Speaking to his earthly parents, who had LOST HIM at a city-festival, found him in the Temple, and Jesus’ pre-teenage voice, cracking as he plainly said, “Why are you looking for me? Didn’t you know that I must be where my Father’s work is!” Potent — both intimacy and mission wrapped into one sentence…(Lk 2:48-50)
As Jesus’ life progressed, he was sent out as the Light of the World, doing incredible work and breaking through the hardest barrier in the Universe – the human heart. Even still, as a Good Father, God was ever-present and affirming of his Son, attuning regularly with Jesus in times of intimate prayer and communion.
And it is in fact, the same relationship God hopes for all those chasing after the Jesus-Way. We have a real opportunity to be “Fathered by God” – to find our true identity, and our true purpose and mission in life. There are enough voices vying for our hearts and our dollars in this culture – it will take focus and intentionality to be fathered by God, but its worth it – not just for your own life, but for your children’s.
H a s h b r o w n 11:29 pm on November 15, 2011 Permalink
This is a great point/topic. I remember a church movement to which I once belonged having bowling get-togethers every other week, where older members and younger members were on mixed teams, hanging out and building relationships. Although people were often drawn to folks in their same age group, there was a degree of elder-to-minor nurturing happening. Some struggles for many church families, sadly–and a topic worth addressing–are having a balance of (1) interacting with regular people (i.e., non-Christians) and interacting with our brethren in the Lord and (2) interacting with our peers who are like us and interacting with wiser/more mature believers.
Some of us lean heavily towards spending time with our brethren in the
Lord–and, often times, folks around the same age. Some of us
lean more heavily towards spending time with regular folks or those new
to the Church and doing the nurturing. Many churches of whom I’ve been a part have, at the very least, always taken nurturing brand new “converts” seriously–inviting friends and/or volunteers to stay in regular contact with and support them, inviting newly-born-again folks to join small groups, discipleship trainings, Bible studies, various ministry groups, etc. Don’t know if a new model/paradigm is needed for older believers and younger believers to see how spending time together can look (e.g., explicitly teaching someone else’s minors/children, beyond just being a role model, can be a sketchy topic for many)…or if folks just need to follow the Spirit leading them to help raise the next generation.
Mark W 2:50 pm on November 16, 2011 Permalink
Well said! The two fulcrums you describe are plainly visible in the lives of most Christians. I’m wondering if you see those two tensions (Christian/Non-Christian) and (peer/non-peer) as balances between “good and bad” – what I mean is, are there seasons we need to be with people just like us, and seasons we need to venture out into diversity?
I tend to think that just like the High School lunch room – it is “easier” to sit at the table of folks just like me (nerds, jocks, goths, etc) – this carries over into adulthood too – Chicago’s neighborhoods look a lot like the High School lunch room – just as segregated. This is both beautiful and tragic. When folks hang out with people like them, real cultures are created. But there is rarely transformation and stretching unless heterogeneity is encouraged.
Follow up with me on this – you’ve got my gears turnin’…
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