Of course, the brothers are now scared that Joseph will punish them for their abuse and torture of him as a child. But Joseph is not like most younger brothers. He is not like most PEOPLE.  Here’s why:

All of us have trauma from our past, just like Joseph. And we live it out in our present. I am no different – I react, and recoil from the triggers that go off whenever I am reminded of some painful memory (even if I don’t consciously remember what originally caused the pain.)

We may know that what we’re doing in reaction to today’s event is disproportionately elevating the importance of today’s event (“You left the socks on the floor AGAIN!!???!?”) We tell ourselves lies about ourselves, (“No one cares about me, just look at those socks on the floor!”) about God, (“What kind of God would create a world where socks are left on the floor!?”) and about those we close to us.

All of it is drawing on early life experiences, where demons have crept into our fragile, innocent hearts and replaced the truth with lies, clarity with deception.

But somehow – Joseph was able to overcome all that. It was certainly a trauma for him to be thrown by his own brothers into that pit, but as he faces his brothers in Genesis 50:20 he declares,

“As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good, to bring it about that many people should be kept alive, as they are today. So do not fear; I will provide for you and your little ones.” Thus he comforted them and spoke kindly to them.

This is supernatural healing! This is the return from darkness, and into light! Some people in Joseph’s place might have made it out of that pit physically, but mentally and spiritually they allow themselves to remain stuck in that pit for the rest of their lives. To make matters worse, they won’t rest until everyone is in that pit with them!

My question is: “Are traumas and the resulting “triggers” permanent, or can we overcome them?”

I have to rely on God’s Word here, and throughout the Bible – we can return from darkness, trauma, pain, and move to light, freedom, and salvation. This is the “working out of our salvation,” the “binding up the strong man,” the Satan speaking lies in our hearts. And yet, if we try to do this salvation work on our own, if we set out to “bind the strong man” we will lose!  We will end in frustration (others had to help Joseph out of his pit, and beyond human intervention, and God was there guiding Joseph forward).

But maybe the most important part of Joseph’s tale is how he views his own story. He knows that it wasn’t his doing that got him to where he is today, it was “God who meant it for good…” Out of this new narrative, Joseph is able to “speak kindly” to his brothers, the very ones who had plotted his destruction many years ago. Joseph was able to see clearly, while his brothers were still trapped in fear of their brother’s punishment. Joseph saw that God had used a horrific situation and used it to bring hope and healing to many people during a drastic famine.

Take stock of your memories. Mark my words, they are taking stock of you.

Take your painful experiences to the LORD, and ask him to give you new lenses through which to view your story!

It’s the difference of giving hope and life to many others, or sitting stuck in your own pit.

But the much of the world would have you believe otherwise.  Yes, the world and the Devil would want you to think that your true hopes, your inner feelings, are not important to the grand scheme of God.  That he’s got bigger and more important things to care about.  That he’s a Father too wrapped up in his work of “saving the world” for him to really notice one of his kids in the corner, crying.

This is the best lie Satan has offered us – and we’ve bought it.

We’ve bought the notion that God makes us as purely rational, emotionless, detached brains – and that all the emotions we feel are the whims of the flesh – something to be suppressed and conquered.  If that’s what the heart is for, we should go ahead and cut all the Psalms, and most other parts of the bible straight out.  But thanks be to God – your heart matters.

So how do you engage your heart as a means of connecting to God?

• When you approach God in prayer, start by approaching yourself. Let your own heart be a starting place for conversation with God – “the water cooler” topic between you and your Creator is “How ’bout them emotions?”
• Start each journal entry with “God, this morning, I feel ___(insert emotion here)__ .” Maybe you can go on to explain why, or maybe you have no idea at all.  Just be honest with the LORD.
• When you feel you’ve laid all the cards of your heart out on the table in prayer before God, sit for a moment in silence and emptiness and then ask, “What do you have to say about all of this?”

Funny thing is, he wants that honesty more than any words of empty praise you could offer him.  It offers a kind of translucence in your dialogue – a frankness that cuts through the rout prayers and the laundry lists that block you from true communion with God.

Live your whole day aware of your heart.  When you are angry, notice what’s happening inside and offer that up to God, when happy, or when sad… he cares.  Your heart matters.

In fact – it is your heart that matters most to God. Rescuing our hearts has been God’s project from the beginning – after the Fall, humanity finds our heart distant and blocked from God’s heart.  The process of redemption is learning to cross the chasm and authentically share our true selves with God – and in that intimate moment of full self-disclosure, we can have faith that God’s whole heart will be revealed to us as well.

Your heart matters more than you can ever imagine.

It just means the first insurance you bought wasn’t good enough.

We do the same thing with God – if God is our ultimate trust – more than just an insurance policy, but the largest thing we can hold onto in our lives, and we toss in some “functional saviors” (coined so perfectly by pastor Tim Keller) are we really content with the power of God?

What are your “functional saviors?”

For the Jews, it was all the things they couldn’t have under the Law of Yahweh.  According to the Law, they couldn’t eat pork, so what’s the first thing you go for when life turns sour?  You got it – a greasy bag of pork rinds!

God laments in Isaiah 65:

65:3 All day long they insult me to my face

by worshiping idols in their sacred gardens.

They burn incense on pagan altars.

4 At night they go out among the graves,

worshiping the dead.

They eat the flesh of pigs

and make stews with other forbidden foods.

11b …you have prepared feasts to honor the god of Fate

and have offered mixed wine to the god of Destiny…

Do you have to realize you’re dividing up your trust among idols – considering God “not-enough?”  No – I think there are lots of things that become our functional savior that we don’t even realize.  Let these questions from Darrin Patrick help expose the ‘other gods’ in your life:

• What do I worry most about?
• What, if I failed or lost it, would cause me to feel that I did not even want to live?
• What do I use to comfort myself when things get bad, or difficult?
• What do I do to cope?  What are my release valves?  What do I do to feel better?
• What preoccupies me?  What do I daydream about?
• What makes me feel the most self-worth?  Of what am I the proudest?  For what do I want to be known?
• What do I lead with in conversations?
• Early on, what do I want to make sure people know about me?
• What prayer, unanswered, would make me seriously think about turning away from God?
• What do I really want and expect out of life?  What would really make me happy?
• What is my hope for the future?

God is interested in being your only trust – your only investment – your only insurance.  Give it a try – throw off the other “blankets” that wrap around your trust in God – it is amazing how light the burden will become.